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Drew is an idealist. Instead of exhaustively searching for obscure ways to make my person sound even the slightest bit interesting to a race apathetic and cadaverous, I've concluded one can gain a relatively accurate analysis of Drew and all that ensnares her, through the contents of this blog. It's all gravy here.

Live long and prosper.

Posts tagged feeling.

Spilling over every side

Every time I go to see a film, upon departing from the theater, I’m reminded how infinitesimally small I truly am in the grand scheme of things. From the moment my rebellious grub-ass reclines back into that chair and sticks my feet on the chair in front of me, I become hyper-aware of how minuscule my thoughts, opinions and beliefs are rendered to societal eye. Copious amounts of doubt begin to flood the cerebrum, rushing with an unremitting current that stops for nothing or no one. Without fail this lack of conviction, quandary and other various inadequacies or substandard ingredients really lodge themselves comfortably in all the cracks and crevices underneath this thick skull. Voids, if you will, that one could assume were left vacant for potentialities, are now occupied with mediocrity and self-loathing.

You know what the most heart-wrenching part about this entire thing is? I’m not alone in experiencing any of this. Millions of people go to bed feeling grossly unsatisfied with themselves, and I think there’s something horribly wrong with that.

But what do I know, right? I’m just some girl on Tumblr.

I have this strange feeling that I’m not myself anymore. It’s hard to put into words, but I guess it’s like I was fast asleep, and someone came, disassembled me, and hurriedly put me back together again. That sort of feeling.

Haruki Murakami  (via slychedelic)

Precisely how I’ve been feeling lately.

#feeling  #quote  #lately  

You send surges of stimulative electricity through my veins. Within seconds, this electricity arrives at the most treacherous thing known to man: the heart. The heart is desperate and will often blindly lead us to illusory goals. Who can claim to truly know it? It is deceitful.

This is not a collection of cliches, this is a factual truth that I’m physically experiencing. Not my stomach, but within the confinement of my heart, myriads of butterflies seem to exist. Each radiating a subtle warmth, while simultaneously fluttering. Their delicate wings working gracefully and consistently. Myriads. All inhabiting a relatively small muscle in the body. Imagine that feeling. The state of mind that is permitted by this physical feeling is absolutely celestial. That’s currently the best description I have, and I still feel like it’s completely inadequate.

Can you imagine this feeling is sanctioned by an individual over 1000 miles away? Opposite end of the country. I reside in the frigid north, as he resides in the tropical south. The part I dread the most is that he isn’t even aware of his doing the aforementioned. I’m not even certain if he is as interested in my existence, as I am his.

How does one manage?